I look around small town where I live and find that the number of single men are limited. Perhaps that is why so many of the single women I know have been turning towards the world of online dating. I would be lying if I said I had never tried it. In fact it is the opposite. In my 20’s I was desperately seeking a boyfriend. Perhaps I was seeking affection and someone to love. Whatever the reason I turned to every dating site I could find. Whether it was Match.com,eHarmony or even Sugardaddie.com. What I found was a slew of men who were interested in hook-ups and nothing more. Men whose profiles stated that there relationship status was complicated. That of course being the term married but seeking a fling. I dated a bunch of men who turned out to Mr. Wrong. I dated men who put the moves on me the first night, who talked about their ex-girlfriends or ex-wives all night long, men who complained the whole evening about past relationships or life in general. I had men who took one look at me and walked right back out the door crushing my heart into pieces. There were men who used me as arm candy and nothing more. Men who took away my self-worth, one who worked hard to diminish my self-esteem. I had one who invited me to go away with him but spent no time with me at all. Another who treated me as a child. I met one who proceeded to put the moves on my mother right in front of me and I kicked him to the curb immediately. Though I had developed a lasting friendship with one guy, I had found a nightmare in the very last guy I dated, who in the end became my son’s father. I guess you could say he was the devil himself for he was always up to no good. He was a man who not only emotionally and verbally abused me but had me stalked and harassed. When he threatened to take my life I stood my ground and fought back for not only myself but my son.In the end I moved back to my hometown to raise my son. His father chose not to have anything to do with him.Flash forward many years later and I see so many women who have just been divorced and are immediately jumping into relationships with guys they met online. I look at these women who are so desperate to be loved that they are seeking the perfect guy on these dating websites. Some have met a few good ones and yes there may be some good ones out there. As for me I realize that it’s hard to find one in a small town but when it comes to online dating I remain gunshy. I have been used so many times by different men that I met on those sites. I have worked so many years to get my self-worth back and don’t want to lose it. When it comes to meeting Mr. Right I am leaving it up to fate.